Vampires may be bloodthirsty but they are also hopelessly romantic. Case in point — this frisky fellow with his heart shaped coffin made for two. Ample, um, “sleeping quarters” are also equipped with an 8k flatscreen, stereophonic sound, and chilled champagne (tinted with just the right amount of blood to create a perfect pink). What vampiress could resist the invitation of this undead Casanova?
Happens to everyone. Happy Valentine’s Day!
I Scream, You Scream
We all scream for frozen brains and ice cream. Generally brains are a dish best served warm (better color, more jiggle), but nothing beats this old timey classic.
Delicious Zombie Desserts
I figured I should draw something romantic for Valentine’s Day, and what’s more romantic than two zombies slurping frozen brains right out of the skull together? Brain freeze is always a danger when eating icy treats, but don’t worry about the love of these two surviving — it’s not like death can do them part.
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Sure beats traveling overseas by boat in a box.
Supersonic Bat Travel
Before supersonic bat travel, the only way for a New World vampire to visit relatives in Transylvania was by coffin over stormy seas. But now with Vampire Airlines, visiting the Old World is now only a short red eye flight away (daytime travel is shunned, for obvious reasons).
Beverage Service, Movies, and More
Vampire Airlines provides all the amenities you would expect from a first class carrier. All flights come with unlimited Bloody Marys (prepared with real Mary) and in-flight vampire movies. What are you waiting for – go visit Grandpa and Grandma Nosferatu in the Old Country today!
Clown puke, ew!
DEATH IS A CIRCUS
Especially when you feed on clowns. When attending the circus, one should avoid the food entirely, or at least stick with peanuts, popcorn, and red-blooded creatures like trapeze artists and lion tamers.
BARFUM & BAILEY
I recently watched the really great Hammer horror film, Vampire Circus, which provided inspiration for this cartoon. That said, there is nothing in Vampire Circus that relates to this cartoon other than the words “Vampire” and “Circus.” But that’s all the inspiration required in the Grinsane Asylum to spend hours meticulously coloring clown barf in Photoshop.
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She dares not to bare.
THE BOOB VERSUS THE BOTTLE
I known several human mothers who have experienced the “little nipper” problem to the point of misery, so I can only imagine the horror felt by vampire moms when the baby fangs arrive. Bottle feeding is the only practical solution in these cases. Just please, for the health of the baby, use real blood and not blood formula.
VLADY JUNIOR – BITE OF THE BAT BOY
Please don’t think I’m making light of a sensitive subject. Grinsane takes its responsibilities seriously not only as a source of quality horror comedy cartoons, but supernatural anthropology. You come here to laugh. You come here to learn.
I hope you enjoyed this week’s double undeader of vampire comics. Check back next week for more strange toons!