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Skeleton Army Necromancer Cartoon

Skeleton Army

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Skeleton Army Necromancer Cartoon

They complain, they lose things (often their own body parts), and needless to say they have certain physical disadvantages (no muscles, no flesh… need I go on?). Having your own skeleton army may be hip if you are a necromancer and it’s hard to imagine a haunted castle without them, but they really are quite a pain to manage and probably more trouble than they are worth.

Necromancy Ain’t Easy

You sleep with the dead, smell like a rotten fish, and spend your days searching cemeteries for obscure spell components. And what do you get for your troubles? A gaggle of brainless boneheads barely capable of lifting their swords much less using them. Good luck acquiring new territory, wiping out rival wizards, or even mounting a proper defense of your evil forest with these substandard servants. Pro tip: befriend a dragon. Much sexier and infinitely more powerful (assuming you aren’t incinerated on first contact).

Crypt Crypto Currency Cartoon

Cryptcurrency

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Crypt Crypto Currency Cartoon

Anyone who has read fantasy literature or played Dungeons & Dragons, Mork Borg, or other role playing games is no doubt familiar with the original “crypto”: gold, silver, and platinum coins piled in heaps and jealously guarded by dragons, liches, skeletons and the like.

TOMB RAIDER TREASURE AWAITS INTREPID ADVENTURERS AND INVESTORS

Modern day cryptocurrency has little in common with this old school “crypto.” While modern crypto is located in the clouds, old school crypt coin is found deep in the earth in cursed tombs and other forbidden locations.

When seeking out investment opportunities, it’s hard to wrong with a ginormous pile of gold guarded by undead skeletons. As for that other, modern day stuff? No one in their right mind raids a tomb with hope of getting rich on blockchain technology.

The Grim Peeper Cartoon

The Grim Peeper

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The Grim Peeper Cartoon

Mmmmmm, skeleton chicks.

Grim Reaper New Years Resolutions Cartoon

Reaper Resolutions

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Grim Reaper New Years Resolutions Cartoon

While most of us are trying to lose weight, others are trying to gain it.

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