Happy Thanksgiving! There are many Thanksgiving traditions, but none quite as revered as the slicing of the turkey. Traditionally this duty belongs to the patriarch, who has generally done nothing in the kitchen that day but suddenly emerges as the only one capable of this profound act of dexterity, thereby reaping an undeserved degree of credit for the meal while his beleaguered wife pours herself a fourth glass of wine and topples from exhaustion. But in the Sawyer Family the responsibility of cutting up the bird is granted to the youngest child, Leatherface, who does such a superb job rendering the meal into bite size bits that no one would dare challenge him. And mmmmmmmm, nothing really seasons a bird like fresh chainsaw oil.
Not your typical use for a selfie stick.
I made this cartoon based on the notion that as of yet no one has deliberately fed themselves to a giant snake in order to capture what would be compelling video footage — but that in this day and age of dangerous selfies, someone probably would. Then I remembered, wait, there was some guy who actually tried to get himself eaten by an anaconda and even constructed a protective suit for this purpose. The media-hungry “wildlife expert” changed his mind when the meat-hungry wildlife actually began to eat him.
Because of this man’s timidity, the “Feed Yourself to a Giant Snake Challenge” is still there for anyone determined to go the distance (meaning, from one end of the snake to the other). Florida, the location depicted in this cartoon, has a surplus of pythons so it’s just a matter of finding a hungry one and convincing it you are a small deer or tasty raccoon.