First there were slow zombies. Then fast ones. And now…
The Woking Dead – or is it Wokeing Dead? – walk amongst us, torn between self loathing and a lust for power. These zombies, who identify as both living and dead, are barely able to stomach themselves, much less the flesh of others, knowing that the modern day zombie is actually a cultural appropriation of Caribbean religion. They would self-cancel if they could, but that’s not how being a zombie works. Instead they are driven to feed on others, attacking at every opportunity while growing their hoard.
Welcome to 2022 where space travel is becoming commonplace and the number one kitchen appliance is still crock pot. Yes, this classic cauldron has gotten some new buttons over the years and with increased globalism and international shipping the newest models are now showing up on farthest islands where they are being put to use by locals cooking traditional fare like Explorer Stew and Mannistrone Soup.
Cooking an entire turkey is a lot of work, especially a human turkey like the one Hannibal is about to load into the oven. Not only does it take the entire day to cook a beast like this, but you can’t just pop down to the supermarket and buy one out of the freezer.
Sadly, Hannibal will be dining alone this year, which is better than dining in prison. Don’t worry though – the extra food won’t go to waste. He’ll make sure to pass the leftovers along to a local doctors’ charity.
Thanks for Reading!
I appreciate your reading this comic, those of you who still visit websites for your cartoons. Enjoy your Thanksgiving dinner and don’t forget the chianti!
Every city has one nowadays. Every parking lot, it seems. You know exactly what I mean… a cutesy farmers market with arts and crafts and unfortunate children baked into pies. Because that’s what’s really going on with these things. The witches have left the forest and brought their black magic to your local park.
Sound absurd? Consider this: Have you ever seen so many candles on display outside of a church or a seance? What about the weird lotions and soaps these people are always selling? How about those feathery dreamcatchers, strange necklaces, and oddly shaped crystal items? Yes, your local farmer’s market is run by witches. Search your soul, you’ve known the truth all along.
Witch Brenda and her baked goods
But wait, you say, what about all the men selling cheese and honey at these things? They can’t be witches, too.
Well, of course they can. There is nothing a male witch likes better than to strain a batch of honey or age some cheese and watch the delighted expression on your face when you stab a sample with a toothpick. And how about the guys with the rehabilitated birds? In some cases, not just the handlers, but the birds themselves are witches. Male witches are everywhere! Anyone with a beard longer than 3 inches is suspect.
This comic was great fun to draw (although a bit of a pain to color). I’ve been doing lots of movie parodies lately, so I wanted to get back to basics with a good old fashion witch cartoon. It was actually tough to settle on only three “witch craft” kiosks to showcase, and sadly my frog transformation booth had to be placed on the sacrificial altar. I do have an idea I’m thinking about, however — an open call for additional booths from other cartoonists that I will stitch into a longer, potentially endless line of witch craft booths. I’m still working out the details on this and thinking of making it part of a Grinsane one-year anniversary special. Sharpen your pencil and stay tuned!
Thank you for reading another Grinsane comic. Check back next week for more strange and weird horror comedy comics and cartoons!
It’s been some time since we checked in with our resident zombie family, and here they are gathered at the park for a good old fashioned Memorial Day picnic (the last time we saw them, the children were playing telephone by using the Verizon salesman as a human fiber optic network). Seems like everywhere I go this week I’m seeing ads for grilling and barbecuing, but who needs a three hundred dollar grill to gather with the family and enjoy fresh meat outdoors? Certainly not these folks.
This was one of the earliest cartoons I drew for Grinsane, but I’ve held off launching it until now since it seemed too summery to release in the grim of winter when I started creating these comics. During that time, I’ve actually reworked this one a couple of times to try and make the family consistent with my other zombie cartoons. Expect to see more of this intrepid band of corpses shambling through the pages of this comic. The ultimate dad, the father in this nuclear unit isn’t about to let a mere apocalypse break his family apart. Hopefully you too will be enjoying the holiday weekend with your own loved ones (in less morbid circumstances).
I’m all alone this weekend (sniff) since my wife is out of town. I don’t think I’ll be seeing that new Star Wars movie with everyone else since I heard Ron Howard took it over and cut out all the sleazy scenes with the Wookers on Tatooine. So I guess it’s frozen pizza and war movies for me. Or maybe a zombie movie, perhaps?
See you next week for another horror comedy comic from Grinsane!
