If you find yourself developing a pod, it’s important to consult a doctor before making any rash decisions. Your budding doppelganger is intimately connected to your host body, so impulsively dousing it with Round Up could turn both of you into a pile of dead leaves. Depending on the current state of your host body, you may be better off as a pod person anyways. Nothing gets rid of high cholesterol and wrinkles better than becoming a plant.

Seeing a doctor is only the first step. You need a complete pregnancy team working for you during this important chapter in your life. Bringing an experienced horticulturalist on board will give your pod person the best chances of survival. Pod creatures require high amounts of nitrogen and magnesium to grow healthy limbs, along with the proper balance of trace minerals. There is nothing more important to a successful pod person pregnancy than good fertilizer. Consult your local university extension for other useful growing tips.

When it comes time to transfer your consciousness to your new body (what folks in the 50s used to pejoratively call “Body Snatching”), the old methods are still the best. Simply go to sleep and let the monstrous alien intelligence that will soon be your new lord and master do it’s evolutionary work. Don’t forget to cancel your internet service before your final rest. You will soon be a part of a neural network that will make Google seem like an outdated collection of Alfredo sauce recipes and cat videos.

What are you waiting for. Go sniff some strange flowers! After you’ve been pollinated, check back on Friday for another weird horror comic from Grinsane.