Monkeypox sounds pretty horrible – fever, fatigue, body aches, and of course, festering red bumps decorating your flesh from head to toe. But what about the other symptoms — the ones those sneaky, deep state doctors aren’t telling you about? Like an insatiable craving for bananas and growing a tail? Truly the best way to avoid this terrible situation is to move to a monkey free island someone where off the coast of Antarctica where monkeys are unlikely to appear and sprinkle you with their pox. In the meantime, start buying bananas!